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These questions are sadly often neglected and shoved under rug in the name of religion. Yet, in the safety of their rooms and under their soft blanket, Muslim women of all ages are turning to one another for the answers.
I recall many nights more than I care to admit staying up on the phone with my friends as we, in hushed tones, tried to understand what this thing called love is. These conversations became more frequent when I moved to the United States.
Despite our best efforts, we were unable to come to terms with the concept of dating while being Muslim. Sure, we knew the basic rules of Islam that dictate the proper relations between a man and a woman, but, those guidelines never answered what it means to love and to be loved. To complicate matters further, Muslim dating apps, such as Minder, have digitized love and faith.
Now in the same room where we were young at heart and the idea of love was new, we sit with our phones, and our faces in screens as we swipe our feelings away.
The millennial Muslim generation is truly standing at the intersection of tradition and modernity, and facing a very difficult question: Can we hang on to our faith, while navigating modern day romance? I can not begin to explain how often I had to use powerful Google research skills as I hunted after the answer to this complex question. However, along the way there were a few promising words of advice that have brought me solace and I wish to share them with you all.
The best way I have found to manage modern day love, while still being a chaste Muslim woman depended on simply knowing my values and my worth. As modern women, we will come face to face with many eligible, cute men hopefully! Dating is hard regardless of your religious background. As a practicing Muslim though, those, quote on quote, normal hardships take on a new form.
In traditional Islam, being with the opposite sex before marriage is a breeding ground for sin. The problem with dating as a Muslim woman is almost always one of culture than religion. The same problem exists when dating while Muslim.
Is he considering you in any way without you having to ask or fight for it? With a seat at the head of the table, you get choice meat at dinner and the first serving of each dish. Hours will pass over a cup of tea, with a spread of sweet almonds, dried fruits and biscuits while you linger from conversation to conversation.
They give the best of what they have to offer. And they will thank you for the honor of visit. When you cross the threshold into her heart, you get the best of whatever she has to offer. This is where dating is about more than just courtship. Sometimes anger is necessary and it needs to be expressed.